When Good Ideas Catch You by Surprise

It seemed like a good idea three months ago—doesn’t it always? The kind of idea that feels manageable at first, then suddenly grows bigger and barrels toward you like D.C. rush-hour traffic. For me, that idea was planning a family vacation for eighteen people, complete with celebrating Gary’s 70th birthday and retirement.

Balancing Structure and Flexibility

When you’re responsible for organizing something this big, there’s a delicate balance: you need enough structure to guide people and flexibility to make their own choices. The truth is, most people actually want someone to decide for them—they don’t say it out loud.

Over the years, I’ve learned that a strength is often revealed when people marvel at something you’re doing, and you think, But this is just what I do. That’s a clue worth paying attention to. For me, it’s planning and facilitating—whether logistics for eighteen people or the little extras that make an event memorable.

The Little Things Matter

If something is important enough, you find a way. I’m not talking about the big things like booking housing or nailing down dates. I mean the small touches that carry meaning—like whether we should host a family awards ceremony during vacation.

Why vacation awards? Because storytelling and tradition matter. They’re how we stitch together memories and pass them down.

Building Tradition Through Awards

Since 2019, I’ve been facilitating various awards ceremonies, and this year, on our family beach trip, I announced we’d hold one on the final day together. One of the challenges with a large family is the age gap—fifteen years between the oldest and youngest. Stories I tell my younger kids often earn an eye-roll from the older ones, who insist, “Mom, you never did that with us. That must have been with our other siblings.”

The awards ceremony bridged that gap. My younger children had experienced it, and now, for the first time, the awards ceremony included my older children, spouses, and even grandchildren.

At first, not everyone was sure about it. Our six-year-old granddaughter, for example, wasn’t quite certain what the hubbub was about. But after two awards were given, she lit up with excitement. Instead of handing her four-month-old cousin a pre-made certificate her mom had created, she decided she needed to make her own. She sat down, drew one with great care, and proudly presented it.

It was a simple moment, but powerful. She wasn’t just a spectator in that space—she was part of the tradition. And that’s the point: ceremonies like this ensure everyone belongs to the story, regardless of age.

Looking Back

What started as a “good idea” that threatened to overwhelm me turned into something meaningful. Planning vacations and ceremonies for eighteen people might not sound like everyone’s idea of fun, but it’s where I come alive. It’s where my strengths naturally spill out.

And in the end, it’s not about the schedule, the meals, or even the beach house. It’s about creating spaces where tradition is born, memories are shared, and every family member—young or old—has a role to play.

And because I know you’re curious, here are my awards from two daughters-in-law.